Parenting Single Handedly


Whether divorced or still in marriage, some of us feel stressed with parenting single handedly. It takes away lot of energy and you feel drained at times. You wish you could get some support from your spouse. You feel lonely in this whole battlefield of parenthood. To add to that is also the guilt of not being a perfect parent. Does that ring a bell?

I have been a single parent for 14 years, 10 years in the marriage and 4 out of marriage. I know it is draining not because of the children, it's draining because of the expectations and disappointments. Yes, it does help to have support in raising a child. My question is, does the support have to be from the spouse only? They say you need a village to raise a child and that means a mother and a father are not anywhere near enough to raise a child😁. We need more people in the team. 

So how about adding the first team member in your parenting team... your child. Yes, your child can be your team member or consultant in your parenting. It doesn't matter how many times you fail, fall or mess up, your child will be happy to support. You just have to go and tell your child "I messed up" they will say "Yeah, me too". There is nothing called perfect parenting. Actually my mentor would always say the best parenting tip is 'Stop Parenting'. 

Add many more members from the village/city or should I say build a community to support in your parenting? A big team. You don't have to do it alone. We all can celebrate our parenting failures together. I have seen the power of having a community. It gives a sense of ease and comfort that you are not alone and you can take support from anyone one around you. With so many people, for sure some one will be free when you need it. The burden is not on one or two people, it can be shared.

 No matter how well you do, you are still going to mess up as a parent. Your child will complaint about you to their friends or spouse when they grow up, just like we did. So chill and enjoy this learning journey with a team.

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